Finally....I Got A Great Job!!!

I am so pleased to announce that I finally got a really great job!! I am the Human Resource Coordinator for a factory in Alliance Ohio. No - its not accounting, but I still love it. I just started this past Thursday - and I am absolutely pooped! I haven't felt lethargy and exhaustion like this since a year ago. My stamina isn't what I thought it would be - and of course it is easy to have energy when all you are doing is being unemployed and sitting at home trying to find work. Going out and working full-time when you haven't done it in over 14 months is a whole other story.

Of course, it doesn't help any that I am still missing Shannon very much. I have been thinking about all of the pets that we have cared for over the years. Ron and I both kind of felt awkward during our teenage and young adult years - basically we were underdogs if you will. Well, the pets that we chose to love were no exception. We always took in and loved the furbabies that no one wanted. Of course, the rescue groups never actually come out and tell you that these little furry balls of joy have behavioural issues - you always find that out pretty much after the fact.

BoBo, our male beagle, has lived in Michigan with a couple that needed him more than he needed us - he has been with them about 2 years now. He just kind of showed up on our doorstep (across the street, lying in a ball just off the curb, tied to a stop sign with a piece of twine to be exact). His issues were more of the housetraining variety - not to mention he chewed everything in sight. He will be 9 years old in a week or so. My heart still aches for him - I miss my BoBo Lee very much.

Then there was Shannon - the little girl that my heart still breaks for. I found her on petfinder. The rescue told us that her original name was Stacy - but the wife changed it to Shannon when she became jealous of her husband's secretary (also named Stacy). Strange - but I do like the name Shannon better and it was quite fitting. Shannon had similar housetraining issues as well. It isn't that she couldn't learn or wouldn't learn - she did learn - and more like my personality when I was a teenager - she did what she wanted when she wanted no matter what it was that she knew. Over the years I spent more money on PineSol, Spic N Span and paper towels than I care to calculate. I should have stock in those companies by now. Shannon would usually hold her bladder until we went to bed at night - then the river would run freely across the kitchen floor. Every morning I never knew where Lake Shannon was going to be - and I would usually step in the puddle in my socks. Wet socks are bad enough - let alone socks soaked with the urine of an ornery beagle. But, those were memories and now I miss stepping in pee in the morning. I miss the occasional 'presents' that she would poop out on the floor in the middle of the night too. I miss her feeding schedule, her happy demand for treats at all hours of the day - I just miss her presence.

Of course, then came Sadie. We didn't even have her 3 years before she died. In March of 2007 we panicked big time over the tainted dog food scare because all of our guys had been eating the food and treats on the hit list. Sadie died 3 months after the recall from renal failure. How sad. Sadie was about 9 months old when we got her. We adopted her from a rescue too. And, I found her on petfinder as well. She had been hit by a truck or car that summer - and somehow survived days laying in a ditch followed by more days laying in a pound. She had a hip replacement before we got her and had some internal damage from the accident. God Bless the rescue that got her out of the pound and into a vet - God Bless the rescue that paid the bills for her to get fixed up. After healing from the surgery Sadie had been adopted a few times - none of the adoptions lasting more than a day. Everyone complained that she walked with a limp - that she wasn't normal. And - as you know - most people want the perfect pet. I have news for those people - the perfect pet is the one with flaws. You embrace the good with the bad - the expected with the unexpected. You accept them for who they are - just as your pet accepts you unconditionally.

There are more furbabies we have had over the years - but you get the jist. We like the underdog - they are so full of love. Yes, they require care and patience and above all lots of love. I miss my underdogs - but at least I still have one left with me - Annie. I found Annie while reading the classified in our local paper. It was January 2007 and I saw an ad that was looking for someone to give Annie a good home. It advertised that she was a senior dog and that her owner had passed away. You see, no one wanted Annie. No one called about the ad except for me. So many people don't want an older dog - they figure they will just die soon anyways. That is just wrong. Annie is a senior - and you can tell she misses her original mommy - but she has slowly bonded to me in a way that I had hoped but not expected. Annie has given me a lot of joy. She is my most well-behaved furbaby yet. She is housetrained and only chews on her toys. Of course, with age, the housetraining thing is becoming a little bit of an issue. Her bladder is fine - it is her bowels that get ahead of her. For Annie, by the time she realizes she has to go poopie - the process has already begun. 99% of the time she can get outside in time before the 'presents' start falling - but there are times that she can't. But, I love her - and I deal with it. I am mindful that someday I won't have poop to pick up anymore - there will be no more dog hair on my furniture - no more toys chewed up and strewn through the house. Someday there will only be memories of my dogs. So for now I cherish the good and the not so pleasant.

Yes, it has now been a year since my diagnosis. I need to go back for a CT - but I am just not ready to yet. I am tired and still hurt at times - I just don't want to know. At least not right now. A part of me figures that if I start peeing blood - then I know to get looked at. But with no insurance it isn't easy. Funny thing came in the mail the other day - from Cleveland Clinic. Remember how they canceled my nephrectomy because I didn't have $8,000 to pay up front? Well, my $6,000 bill is in collection and now they send me a letter asking me to donate either $100, $250 or $500 to their hospital to help patients that are not insured or under insured. Can you believe that? A year ago, before the diagnosis, I would have called or written them a chastizing letter - but my cancer diagnosis taught me that I don't have the time or energy for anger or bitter words. I won't expel the energy on it. It is what it is.

Soon snow will be flying again - I don't feel ready for the warm weather to be over. But, I will embrace every season that God gives to me. I am always careful to remember that we are not guaranteed any certain number of days. I still want to enjoy each one to the fullest.